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A Karkat Test - Are You Reliant On Cursing?
Offline 12-17-2016, 12:45 PM (This reply was last modified: 04-24-2017 08:19 PM by Alienoid.)(Edited by Alienoid.)
Reply: #1
A Karkat Test - Are You Reliant On Cursing?
KARKAT VANTAS
[Image: WQ2R6bR.png]

Karkat Vantas. Possibly the most popular troll out of all the betas, as I'm sure many of you know. Definitely one of the most frequently roleplayed characters, along with Dave and John, if I'm not mistaken. Heck, even I give him the old spin sometimes (mostly when I'm writing for personal projects, cough cough signature cough cough Transfusion). Seeing as how I consider myself a not-terrible roleplayer, I figured I'd throw my two cents into the ring. This isn't a full-on guide for Karkat, no. I might make one eventually, but for now, I just want to address something that I've noticed when looking over how other people portray as Karkat.

How reliant is your Karkat on swearing?
Please note: this is not 'how often does your Karkat swear'. This is, 'how much of your Karkat is just using swear words without enhancing your sentences'.

Let me show you a brief little paragraph of traditional Karkat ranting.
Karkat Wrote:CG: NEVER IN MY PITIFULLY SHORT LIFE SPAN HAVE I EVER FELT THE NEED TO DOUSE MY THINK PAN IN ACID AS STRONGLY AS THIS MOMENT RIGHT HERE.
CG: THIS AMALGAMATION OF COMPLETE NONSENSE HAS DIMINISHED MY UNDERSTANDING OF COMMON SENSE AS IT IS SO MUCH, I THINK I'M ABOUT TO FILE A COMPLAINT FOR ANIMAL ABUSE.
CG: I AM THE BARKBEAST IN THIS ANALOGY, GETTING UNAPOLOGETICALLY WHIPPED SENSELESS BY PARADOX SPACE.
CG: MY MIDDLE FINGERS ARE MY SOLE OUTCRY TO THE UNIVERSE FOR CONDEMNING ME IN SUCH A MANNER.
CG: MY ANGRY SCREAMS FALL ON DEAF AUDIO CANALS AS I TRY TO COMPREHEND JUST HOW TO TROLL MACGYVER MYSELF OUT OF THIS STICKY PREDICAMENT.
CG: BUT I FAIL TO CONCEIVE A PLAN IN THIS UNDOUBTEDLY MINISCULE, SHRIVELLED CLUMP OF GREY MATTER I CALL MY THINKING BEAN, AND INSTEAD PROCEED TO LOSE ANY LAST, TINY, *ABSOLUTELY OBSOLETE* FINGERNAIL OF HOPE I HAVE LEFT FOR THE SALVATION OF THIS RACE I'M EMBARRASSED TO BE A PART OF.
CG: HAVE I BEEN ABLE TO PAINT A SUFFICIENT ENOUGH PICTURE OF MY SUFFERING FOR YOUR INFERIOR HUMAN BRAIN, YOU TUMOUR-RIDDLED STUFFED ANIMAL OF DISAPPOINTINGLY UNDERWHELMING INTELLIGENCE?? OR WILL I HAVE TO WOUND MYSELF AND SMEAR MY WORDS ONTO THE WALL IN MY FREAKISH BLOOD TO BURN THE IMAGE OF MY TORTURE INTO THAT THICK SKULL YOU DARE CALL A STANDARD EXAMPLE OF YOUR FLIMSY HUMAN PHYSIOLOGY????
You done reading that wall of text? Sweet. Read through it again, but look for something. Look for a single use of any swear word. Look for 'fuck', look for 'shit', look for 'ass', heck, even look for 'damn'. Don't bother looking for 'fuckass', because I don't ever use that term and Homestuck rarely did either. Don't use it as Karkat. This isn't speculation. He literally used the word once. Don't.

There's none. You absolutely do not need any curse words at all to be an effective Karkat.

It appears to be a common misconception that Karkat uses swear words instead of saying interesting things. For example:
Karkat Wrote:CG: LOOK THE FUCK AT ME, MOTHERFUCKERS.
CG: I'M KARKAT AND I'VE NEVER FUCKING HEARD OF A DAMN DICTIONARY BEFORE.
CG: I'LL SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH AND FINGER YOUR EARLOBE IF YOU THINK I'VE DONE THAT SHITCRAP.
CG: FUCK YOU AND FUCK EVERYTHING AND FUCK YOU AGAIN.
CG: YOU FUCKASS.
(That's my impersonation of a not amazing Karkat, though admittedly I did have fun writing this.)
See, the fun thing about Karkat isn't swearing a lot. He does swear a lot, sure, and I'm not saying 'never swear as Karkat'. But the fun thing about Karkat is that he says a lot of stupid stuff and goes off the wall with it. He's a very rambly, long-winded character. You know what you should do if you play as a character who is meant to say a lot of words?
*You use a large vocabulary so that you can say more things and not repeat yourself. Make your paragraphs interesting by using words again and again as little as possible.*

Now, remember before when I said something alone the lines of,
Some Dude Somewhere Wrote:[...]I'm not saying 'never swear as Karkat'.
?

I lied.

If you want to get good at roleplaying as Karkat, I'll tell you the best way (in my opinion) to train.
Go and roleplay with someone, be Karkat/Dave/whoever you want to ramble as. And don't use a single instance of profanity. And don't just use 'heck' or 'darn', either. Go without using any of those types of words.

What this does is it removes your dependance on using specific words like 'fuck' or 'shit' to carry your dialogue. If you don't have those words to use, you have to get creative. And being creative is one of the most important skills for being Karkat. You need to think outside the box and start blurting out the most poetic-sounding things ever. Or at least, they would sound poetic if they weren't being screamed out by a whiny thirteen-year old.

That's basically all I wanted to say. If you're trying to perfect your Karkat, try to step away from one of the more 'iconic' parts of being a Karkat. This makes sure that you nail the most important part of actually being a Karkat: creativity and improvisational skills. Don't use curse words to pad your dialogue. Use curse words to give your already long-winded and abstract poems more emphasis. Use them as a means to an end, not the end itself.

Thanks for reading! Peace out.

- Alienoid

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Away 12-17-2016, 12:51 PM (This reply was last modified: 12-17-2016 12:53 PM by ambiguousTrials.)(Edited by ambiguousTrials.)
Reply: #2
RE: A Karkat Test - Are You Reliant On Cursing?
Alienoid Wrote:CG: LOOK THE FUCK AT ME, MOTHERFUCKERS.
CG: I'M KARKAT AND I'VE NEVER FUCKING HEARD OF A DAMN DICTIONARY BEFORE.
CG: I'LL SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH AND FINGER YOUR EARLOBE IF YOU THINK I'VE DONE THAT SHITCRAP.
CG: FUCK YOU AND FUCK EVERYTHING AND FUCK YOU AGAIN.
CG: YOU FUCKASS.

I love how this sounds exactly like real Karkat impersonating all the clearly not real Karkats.

This here should be a Karkat bible.

All hail Alienoid, doing the brillianty thing again.

(Various squawking noises)
Thank you Alienoid for my profile picture! <>
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Offline 12-18-2016, 10:15 AM
Reply: #3
RE: A Karkat Test - Are You Reliant On Cursing?
thaNK YOU??? ? This is more than necessary, and though I'm not sure if I needed this myself, I'm very glad that you went through the trouble to make this little guide-y thing. Brownie points in my heart Heart

Be the hero of your own story.
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Offline 12-31-2016, 07:52 PM
Reply: #4
RE: A Karkat Test - Are You Reliant On Cursing?
This is a very nice guide, and encouraging for me! I tend to avoid swear words as a matter of preference- which can make playing certain characters a real challenge.

I'm glad to know someone else thinks it's perfectly possible to play a convincing Karkat without resorting to swear words multiple times per sentence :)

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