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CT: just found the spreadsheet
CT: updated it with my information
CT: how did we decide to name the universes tho?
CT: I get that U stands for universe, and the number is kinda just in order of who responded first, though what does the ABC and D stand for?
((dude that Bethesda joke made me die you are now my favorite person
GH: I wouldn't be surprised if it was.
GH: As for how I spawned the Denizen and fucked up really bad...
GH: Honestly, I was in a fight. It happened by accident.
GH: I tried to fix the data before spawning the Denizen and my bossy leader fucked it up and spawned it, while also corrupting the data even more.
GH: Leaders who say they are, aren't good leaders at all, they are bullshit.
GH: Thank god I saved Mal before he got infected...
GH: Anyway, you are right about Skaia fucking everything into pieces.
TT: Yo CT, welcome back.
TT: The letters in the session names account for the different clusters.
TT: So for example, all the remixes of different Striders, Harleys, Egberts, Lalondes are part of cluster A.
TT: Make sense?
TT: I feel like TG is on to something here. From what I've gathered it seems like Harley's will always prototype the first guardian.
TT: Karkat... I think we had a Karkat in our session as well.
TT: Jane or Jake would be able to tell you for sure, they spent a year hanging with the other dead players while I was moping around.
TT: Though right now they're a bit occupied with the meet-up going on here.
TT: If you're going to come and join the meet-up then you can just ask them yourself.
((Thanks @The Vantas Inquisition!))

RS: Yeah, I'm asleep now and literally hurtling through the remains of shattered bubbles as we speak.

RS: English is no joke. He is, flat out, the most dangerous being in the entire multiverse.

RS: I would give tips on how to kill him but there aren't any. His alpha self dies at one set location in time and space.

RS: Specifically, what seems to be the end of both. After that it's just...

RS: It's even spreading. I think whatever does him in eventually causes a false vacuum decay event. So much for killing the guy ending realities.

RS: It's funny. Whenever someone sets out to do a thing, they end up doing the opposite of what they set out to do.

RS: They try to kill the god destroying the multiverse and they end the multiverse in the process. Or try to blow up a bomb to destroy a star and end up creating it.

RS: Every solution is the cause of the problem it meant to solve, and every problem ends up causing itself to be solved.

RS: This is the nature of reality. We're all strange loops and eddies in the stream of fate, and...

RS: ...

RS: ...JR, now I think I get what you mean when you say I do a lot of "Seer Talk". Holy fucknuts.
CT: Ah, i see, makes sense, as you seem to be trying to figure out what everyone's standing is
CT: I have updated it with my information.
CT: and if you give me another day or two, I should be out of this infinite three second groundhogs day.
CT: then I can help you guys figure out where you all stand in this whole thing
CT: at one point i did have a program wich simulated all the various sessions, rather vaguely, but quite accurately.
CT: that should help us all quite a bit

JR: @RS "Who removes items from an array while using the array?" It was ONE freaking time, you don't have to make a federal fucking issue out of it. It didn't even kill anybody. No harm, no foul.

JR: Um. So, yeah, I really wasn't thinking "last name" was gonna end up being the uniting feature here. Until otherwise proven, I'm assuming that Prince of Blood has a last name of Harley, yeah. That at least lets me focus where I'm looking for code. @OrangeDirk, maybe your spreadsheet can have a section on baddies???

JR: Also @Orange Dirk, "someone might have purposefully coded our session to screw us over". Well. I mean, there's only a few reasons you'd fuck with SBURB code. You're a masochist Seer/Mage and are "just trying to learn" (though they usually do this particular fuck up in their OWN session, which contains the damage), you're malicious and wanting to fuck other players over, or you're stuck in a null-ass session with a transtimeline network connection and are bored out of your mind and have a vague idea that "maybe we can help other players???".

JR: So, my point is, either our mystery hacker CAUSED your fuck ups because they were an asshole (or were completely indifferent to your misery in pursuit of some goal...English, maybe???), or they were trying to help you. I seriously doubt it was somebody doing it as a learning exercise, because, like I said, tends to explode the session. :\

JR: If they were trying to help you, then I'd put my Boonies on the help taking the form of this weird gathering that's happening. Shit is not exactly common. If they're trying to hurt you, the stupidly common First Guardian prototypings you all have (that somehow relate to English???) are super weird, too. Hell, maybe there are TWO hackers, all badass dueling in your sessions code. I'd believe anything at this point.

JR: Oh, and @CT, SBURB Simulators represent! The AuthorBot is basically doing that for us. Really helps us figure out where in Paradox Space we should be looking. WAY more convenient than hoofing it to each session on our own to see how it went down. Better than a map (how would you even fucking map paradox space, it'd just be a big black piece of paper or some shit).

TT: Causality loops are a bitch, so It looks like killing Lord English is off the table.
TT: Unless of course we somehow end up being the ones who bring about the "false vacuum decay event", whatever that means.
TT: Though it's impossible to tell if we will cause it, or have done something that sets off a chain of events which will cause it.
TT: Temporal causality is like the love child of dominos and Russian Roulette.
TT: Fuck. Time is not my aspect, I am not cut out for this.
TT: JR, it looking more and more like names hold a fuck ton of importance here.
TT: They seem to be the strongest and most consistent uniting variable between all the A cluster sessions.
TT: And CT, breaking the three second loop seems like a great idea and all, but have you considered what might happen once you're free?
TT: You said before that your death is stuck between Just and Heroic because your clock has been affected by the time loop as well.
TT: So when the time loop stops, so does the clock.
TT: This glitch might be a blessing in disguise for you.
TT: Sure, you can't go anywhere you can't walk in threw seconds, but you also can't be killed.
TT: Hell, if we could find a way to pit you against Lord English, then we might be able to keep him busy until predetermined his death.
TT: Actually, can you sleep or does your bodily state reset every three seconds as well?
RS: Well, no REAL people died, JR. The simulated sessions disagree on that regard.

RS: You know, I always wondered, if we simulated a session exactly and did every calculation the game would have, is there any real difference between reality and the simulation?

RS: Are WE a simulation? I mean, most stuff is already code anyways.

RS: If we're a simulation, does it matter that we are?

RS: I think we've all exceeded our FDA recommended caloric intake in terms of food for thought, but there's more for you. Welcome to the brain buffet. Avoid the morality shrimp, it'll give you the shits.

RS: Apparently the troll session WAS edited minorly, but mainly bug fixes before entry.

RS: II'm iimpre22ed by their skills.


RS: passed through a glitch cloud sorry it scrambled my text a bit

RS: Still surprisingly readable.

RS; Anyways that guy isn't the one we're talking about. I'm doing a search for any mention of the John guy and he's... everywhere and nowhere.

RS: By which I mean ctrl+f and his player data as the searched for term is highlighting the whole damn file tree but not one mention of the player. It's insane.

RS: I must be close, I'm seeing a bubble full of smoke and shit. AB, am I in the right place? Is this the BBQ-Smoked Failure Meet-N-Greet Factory?
?GG: i think u are rs
?GG: more or less ive lessened the fires but
?GG: they keep on happening
?GG: n happening
?GG: also a john...
?GG: @vg - jake - said the dude he met was a dave
?GG: n that dave ended up mentioning a john
?GG: i rly doubt its the john ur talkin bout but
?GG: there r chances

AB: RS, there is a 93.42427034612903% chance that you are about to be slow cooked to perfection, yes. If you were a flawless automaton, perhaps you would be able to handle the heat?

AB:While you have all been busy pointlessly communicating using plain text, I've actually been useful.

AB: I can confirm that there is an aberrant amount of "related" sessions all in the same spatial-temporal area. I can further confirm that the relatedness of the sessions does not stop from getting taller. I would postulate that these sessions have performed the human taboo of "incest".

JR: Wait. What? How can you even fucking say that? Sessions don't reproduce sexually, or even with that weird troll slurry. One session produces one or more child sessions, full stop. It's asexual.

AB: It seems you believe that SBURB isn't a glitchy bullshit factory. In fact, I would venture that there is a 96.85781387643634% that you aren't quite as "jaded" as you try to appear. You still think it all makes sense, deep down, don't you.

JR: ... Regardless of what I believe, how can sessions be incestuou...

JR: Oh. Fuck. You're referring to the "Incestuous Mobius Multi-Session Reach Around" aren't you. Fuck.

AB: It seems your fleshy brain has finally caught up. Yes. Sessions can be "incestuous" if they perform a loop. Session A creates a child Session B, which creates C, until finally Z creates A. Should Session Z invade session A through standard "Sick Frog" protocols, session A ends up mutated and slightly different and the loop becomes a spiral. (For those following at home with inferior brains, many of the Troll sessions in Universe A invaded their child sessions, which contained humans).

AB: I detect a higher than normal density of these mutations for Universe A, as if the loops jumped off the hook and performed a spirographical pirouette.

JR: Fuck. Well. That's why you're the best, AB. But I'm not seeing any action items here. Just because we know HOW shit went weird doesn't mean we know why? Was it the hacker? Was it random chance? And what can we do about any of it?
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